...born with the gift of laughter and a sense that the world was mad.
And one more: A must-read by Julie Burchill.
One more tune before I go: I never did get to see Celine during our trip to Vegas. But, given the chance, here’s how I’d update the bombastic chanteuse’s most famous song, "My Heart Will Go On":
Every night in their dreams
They see scenes of triumph
That is why the jihad goes on.
Far across the planet
They scan it, see weakness.
That is why the jihad goes on.
Near, far, wherever we are
I believe that the jihad does go on.
Once more they try for a score
And they strike for jihad
And jihad will go on and on.
Hate endures forever
And lasts through the ages.
And won’t go until they have won.
Hateful when they told us
We’re lower than they are.
That is why the jihad goes on.
Near, far, wherever they are,
They believe that the jihad goes on.
Now, calm, they strap on a bomb
And climb on board a bus
Hate for us will go on and on.
There is some hate that will not
Go away.
They’re here. There’s plenty to fear,
And you know that their jihad goes on.
They’ll rage, be on the same page.
And they’ll stage scenes of gore
And encore it goes on and on.
See you in September: It’s time for my annual end-of-summer break. I’ll be away from my computer until Sunday, Sept. 3. All being well, I’ll be back atcha then.
Return of the native: In my capacity as activist, I am compelled to scan the Globe and Mail every day. But if I have to read one more piece like this one, in which Mark “Malarkey” MacKinnon has another one of those noble natives pining for lost olive groves stolen by rapacious Jews, I might have to take drastic action.
In today’s “let’s feel bad for the poor, victimized Arabs” piece, MacKinnon offers up a “grizzled” elder who wants his portion of Shebaa Farms back, please. But he’s so noble that he’s willing to give up his claim if only it will bring something he longs for even more than his stolen land: an enduring peace.
Wow. He really is noble and selfless.
According to MacKinnon, that just might be possible, once
In other words, there’s not a hope in Hades—and MacKinnon wants you know that it’s almost entirely
If you can bear to read them, here are the opening paragraphs:
The grizzled, 71-year-old farmer is one of the few Lebanese who has ever seen the Shebaa Farms, a small and fertile patch of soil that Hezbollah says it has been fighting for years to free from Israeli occupation.
Mr. Marquise says that 95 hectares of the Shebaa Farms belongs to his family, who used to grow olives and fruits there when he was a young man. He hasn't seen the land since it was seized by
"It's mountainous and rocky, but greener than here," he says, nodding at the brown landscape around this devout Sunni Muslim village near the juncture of
But as lush as he recalls the land being, he doesn't consider the Shebaa Farms -- which are actually 14 separate plots -- to be worth the blood that's been shed in the name of "liberating" them. Given the choice, Mr. Marquise says he'd rather have extended peace than another war ostensibly intended at freeing Shebaa. "If peace takes place, then maybe the Shebaa Farms will come back to us. We want peace first. The wars bring nothing."...
Hey, maybe the Lebanese can put this guy in charge of negotiations. He seems to be
Update: My letter to the Globe:
Ever since the Six Day War, when
Well, Israel returned the land—all the land—in Lebanon and Gaza, and all it got in return was missiles fired into Israeli territory and genocidal Islamists, like Hezbollah and its sponsor, Iran, crowing about their great victory and insisting that, next time, they would prevail in their goal of wiping Israel off the map.
Looking at the map showing Shebaa Farms—and hearing a Lebanese professor aver that Hezbollah’s “raison d’etre is resistence”—should remind us that “the thorny knot” gumming up the works here is not a few disputed acres in what may or may not be Lebanese territory. (
In that sense at least, the whole issue of Shebaa Farms is less a thorny knot than it is a red herring. And frankly, like fish left out on the counter too long, it’s beginning to smell.
No, not the Khadrs. The Trudeaus. From the Ceeb:
The premiere Canadian edition of celebrity magazine Hello! hit newsstands on Thursday with 12 pages devoted to the Trudeau family.
The weekly tabloid, a Canadian version of the magazine published in Spanish as Hola!, is being published by Rogers Publishing Ltd. and replaces a
The glossy picture spread on Margaret Kemper and Justin and Alexandre Trudeau compares the Trudeau family to the Kennedys and calls them
All three members of the family remark on the legacy of Pierre Elliot Trudeau and speak reverently of worthy causes such as Katimavik, WaterCan and the Trudeau Foundation. There is a separate story about Alexandre Trudeau's latest film, Secure Freedom.
The Trudeaus grace the cover, along with Hilary Duff, who is shown inside posing with fans and appearing at MuchMusic in
I’m rushing out to buy my copy right now!
Q: When is a bomb not a bomb? A: When it’s a penis enlarger: A miscommunication leads to an airport security snafu. From the
The female airport security guard held the small, black, squeezable rubber object she'd just plucked out of Mardin Amin's backpack, and eyed it suspiciously.
Standing next to his mother, an embarrassed Amin whispered out of one corner of his mouth that it was a "pump" -- as in a penis pump. The guard misunderstood the Iraqi man and thought she heard the word "bomb," Amin's attorney told a
"He told her it's a pump," attorney Eileen O'Neill-Burke said as a cluster of burly, snickering police officers watched the court proceedings. "He's standing with his mother. Of course he's not going to shout this out."
But after listening to the female guard testify she heard Amin "clearly" say the word bomb during the Aug. 16 incident at O'Hare Airport, Judge Gerald Winiecki decided there was enough evidence for the case to move forward. Amin, 29, is charged with felony disorderly conduct and faces up to three years in prison if convicted…
I always wondered who bought those things.
Live and learn: Victor Davis Hanson says there are seven lessons we should learn from the war in
…First, death is the mantra of terrorists. In urban landscapes, they hide among apartment buildings, use human shields and welcome all fatalities - friendly or hostile, combatant or civilian. Death of any kind, they think, makes the liberal West recoil, but allows them to pose as oppressed victims.
Their nihilistic hatred intimidates, rather than repels, third parties - whether "moderate" Arabs, Europeans who back off from peacekeeping in
Second, windfall petrol-dollar profits (now around $500 billion annually) financially fuel radical Islam. Iranian cash allowed Hezbollah to acquire the sophisticated weaponry needed to achieve parity in ambushes with the Israeli Defense Forces. Unless the
Third, as
Fourth, the use of old shoot-and-scoot missiles - Katyushas, Qassams and worse to come - is altering the strategic calculus, as they now number in the many thousands. The fear of Hezbollah's near limitless mobile launchers enabled terrorists to put whole Israeli cities in bomb shelters and almost shut down the country's economy.
In the
The “Pluto” of the Liberal caucus: “Innocent Abroad” Borys Wrznewskyj has resigned his post as deputy foreign affairs critic for the Liberal party. Borys, you’ll recall, is the Liberal MP who, during an Arab-sponsored visit to Lebanon said Israel had committed “war crimes” and recommended that Canada “talk” to Hezbollah’s political wing so as to discourage its military wing (because of the vast chasm Boryn and the other useful tools perceive as existing between the two division). Borys insisted that “talking” to Hezbollah is the only way to hash out an eventual peace deal with them.
Borys’s suggestions landed with a thud, and the Liberal party, currently trying to restore some lost lustre and choose a new leader, distanced itself from him post haste.
Not that Borys has changed his mind about chewing the fat with the genocidal terrorists. Not at all. Like those wise old souls at the UN (the organization from which Borys gleaned this blinding insight), he thinks there’s much to be gained by sitting down at a bargaining table and coming to terms with people who want to efface you from the planet.
But then, you and I know something that Borys, the UN and lots of other useful idiots don’t, something that precludes any sort of confab: The jihad is non-negotiable.
Jew-ish, but not Jewish: Mark Steyn, Catholic on both sides, on being mistaken for a Jew. From NRO:
Earlier this year, I chanced to be at a public meeting with the great Caroline Glick of the Jerusalem Post. Afterwards, a gentleman from the audience casually made some allusion to some or other aspect of the Jewish calendar, at which I looked momentarily befuddled. And so Caroline helpfully explained to him that “Mark’s not a Jew, but he plays one on TV.”
By which she meant that, as I publicly “defend”
And, of course, I’d only been off the air for ten minutes before I was deluged with e-mails triumphantly announcing, “Ah-ha, something to hide, have we, Steyn? Or should I say Stein? Or is it Goldstein? Why so defensive about being Jewish, eh? How come you don’t have the guts to declare your Jewishness every time you write about
I didn’t know I was hiding it. There’s a couple of FAQs about it on the biographical page of my website — “But why not on the homepage, Goldsteinberg, eh? Something to be ashamed of, is it?” — and, given the number of columns I’ve published about
But I realized, in fact, that this cheap crack would be doing the Third Reich an injustice. Even the Nuremberg Laws would have cut me more slack than my Internet chastisers: “Article Five, Section One: A Jew is an individual who is descended from at least three grandparents who were, racially, full Jews.” Under the 1935 German laws on race, I would have qualified as a bona fide citizen of the Reich. But the cyber-enforcers among my readers run a tighter ship than the Führer. Half my mail reads like some ancient Woody Allen pickup line: Have you got a little Jew in you? Would you like one?
Nick Cohen, of the Observer in
“I typed out a reply that read, ‘but there hasn’t been a Jewish member of my family for 100 years.’ I sounded like a German begging a Gestapo officer to see the mistake in the paperwork. Mercifully, I hit the ‘delete’ button before sending.”
So, yes, I am a Jew, because, after all, only a Jew could “defend”
Astonomical demotion: It’s a sad day for fans of a nine planet solar system. Pluto has been stripped of its official designation and is being unceremoniously turfed our of the planet club.
From now on, it will be known as a “dwarf planet.”
Which sort of makes it the “
Faux—and real—fears: Remember when folks were all freaked out about Y2K (which turned out to be a bit fat nothing) when what we should really have been worried about was the jihad and trying to connect the dots that culminated, a year and ¾ later, in 9/11?
That’s kind of like the situation today, but with a much longer time frame. We were all awaiting Doomsday on August 22, which has now come and gone with the world more or less intact. Meanwhile, we should really be worried about this.
Sex and death: File this one under “too funny.” From the
5 arrested after strippers perform at farm funeral
Five people were arrested after two groups of strippers gave “obscene performances” at a farmer’s funeral last week in
The disrobing was to boost attendance. “Local villagers believe that the more people who attend the funeral, the more the dead person is honoured.” 200 showed up last week.
It reminds me of the old Red Skelton (or George Jessel) quip about the “standing room only” crowd that turned out for the funeral of unlovable
For the love of dead Jews: From an AP story in the Toronto Star:
"OSLO—A sprawling mansion used by Norwegian Nazi collaborator Vidkun Quisling during World War II openend yesterday as a center to oppose the intolerance, hatred and treachery he represented.
The
To which I say, big whoop.
Why am I so underwhelmed? Could it be because of the European penchant for shedding crocodile tears and erecting monuments to dead Jews, meanwhile reviling the live ones? Could it be because
Yes, yes, and yes.
And in case you think I’m being harsh on the Norwegians, I am posting this. It’s from a response written by Jewish Norwegian journalist to a piece that appeared in the Norwegian paper Aftenposten earlier this month calling for the elimination of the Jewish state. The journalist, Mona Levin, has been subjected to concerted verbal attack in her homeland for daring to support
Which, come to think of it, is exactly what Vidkun Quisling and other Nazis used to say about the Jews. (The article was translated by a blogger, so please forgive any infelicities of language or punctuation):
…If I think that
Gaarder is able to write his column No. 2, published in Aftenposten yesterday, without mentioning that there are two sides to the conflict, while I, as a Jew, am placed under pressure of obedience to distance myself from one of the sides.
When a lady by the water’s edge somewhere in peaceful
In
Thomas Hylland Eriksen, professor of social anthropology, goes further. (Aftenposten, August 10). He takes my citizenship away from me by demanding that Norwegian Jews must swear allegiance to the Norwegian state. Thank you so much, professor. My family will soon have been Norwegian for 150 years. It is true that all our civil rights were taken from us in 1940-45, but we got them back afterwards. When you have removed them again, must I then publicly distance myself from
Because of
And now I hear the cries out there: Can’t one criticize
I see it like this: criticism of
Criticism of religion is okay. Insulting of, scorn and contempt for a particular religion, in this case Judaism, is not okay. A hotch-potch of religion, politics and collective condemnation of all the world’s Jews in all ages is very definitely not okay. Just as not okay as believing that all Muslims are fundamentalist suicide bombers.
Where the Holocaust is concerned it is hard not to talk about it, because it affects most Jews on earth. The Holocaust is an aching wound on the body of
So far no one in this debate knows what I think about the war in
What I have expressed an opinion about is the absolute right of Norwegian Jews to walk Norwegian streets and attend Norwegian schools in safety, even if war is raging in the
Thanks for the museum,
The final solution: Harpoon Siddiqui, quoting old gasbag Zbigniew Brzezinski, says there’s a “growing consensus” that “neither the
You’re right, Harpoon. Only
Signs of the time: Some years ago, Ceeb radio used to run a serial every Sunday morning written by Thomas King. Being a Ceeb comedy show, it managed to marry irreverence with political correctness as King, a writer from a First Nations background, poked gentle fun at his own people, and, on occasion, much less gentle fun at us silly-ass white folk. The tag line that ended every show has always stuck in my mind: “Be brave. Stay calm. Wait for the signs.”
Not a bad way to respond to life’s roller coaster, I think--the ups and downs, the twists and turns, the loop-de-loops.
I hadn’t thought of that line for a while. What retrieved it from my cerebral hard drive was a Forbes headline on google news: “Iran Urges West to See ‘Positve’ Signs.”
Good thing that “positive” is in scare quotes, because there’s nothing positive about what
So with nuclear capability well within reach in reach of the creepiest, kookiest and ookiest leadership on the planet, it might be a good time to repeat Thomas King’s Aboriginal mantra: Be brave. Stay calm. Wait for the signs.
And pray like hell that the
Ceeb asleep: On Ceeb radio yesterday evening, a journalist who had just spent the last six months in
Two quotes are in order here. The first, which I’ve cited before, is by that great poet (but despicable Jew-hater) T.S. Eliot. Eliot once wrote (as if he had the Ceeb and its listeners in mind): “Humankind cannot bear very much reality.”
Too true, Tom.
The second quote comes from corpulent Nazi Luftwaffe chief, Hermann Goering. During the Nuremburg trials, Goering had this to say (as if he had the Iranian people in mind):
Of course the people don't want war. But after all, it's the leaders of the country who determine the policy, and it's always a simple matter to drag the people along whether it's a democracy, a fascist dictatorship, or a parliament, or a communist dictatorship. Voice or no voice, the people can always be brought to the bidding of the leaders. That is easy. All you have to do is tell them they are being attacked, and denounce the pacifists for lack of patriotism, and exposing the country to greater danger.
Right on, Hermann!
Proving that a dead, fat Nazi has more insight into human biddability than the Ceeb does.
Reality check: We’re still here. At least for now.
I’d like the Himmler burger with a side of Eichmann fries, please: If you’re visiting Mumbai this summer, here’s a restaurant you want to be sure to avoid. From Reuters:
MUMBAI (Reuters) -
The restaurant, which opened last week, was promoted with posters of Hitler and Nazi swastikas, infuriating
"We hope the Indian authorities will ensure that Hitler being such a mass murderer did not get any rehabilitation," Daniel Zohar Zonshine,
The multi-cuisine restaurant used publicity material featuring a red swastika carved in the name of the eatery.
Its owners, who removed a huge poster of Hitler initially installed at the entrance, have said they chose the German leader's name to stand out among hundreds of restaurants.
But
Zonshine said he hoped the restaurant's owners would realise the hurt their action had caused to Jews.
"There is a limit to a gimmick. In
The restaurant's owners have said they were neither promoting Hitler nor the Nazi ideology, but would not change the restaurant's name.
They have said they would open two more branches in Mumbai with the same name by October.
And coming soon to
The Liberal way: Yesterday Parliamentary Secretary Jason Kenney held a press conference to offer his government’s response to the three MPs who, at the behest of a Canadian Arab organization, had traveled to war-torn
As we know, despite the Ceeb’s and the Toronto Star’s best effort to float that dirigible, it crashed to the ground like a concrete Hindenburg.
The Liberal party, whose MP, Borys Wrzesnywskyj, had compared Hezbollah’s political division to the IRA’s Sinn Fein (there’s that subtle distinction I was mentioning), quickly distanced itself from the remarks. The Liberals, after all, are trying to find a new leader, and the whole
Anyway, back to Kenney’s press conference. It was a joy to behold. Not mincing a single word, Kenney lit into the three MPs and said there was no way Canada was going to open discussions with Hezbollah because it’s a terrorist organization with an agenda of wiping out Israel (the agenda is set out in its charter, said Kenney). As such there is absolutely nothing for us to discuss with them. Period. Game over.
Kenney also remarked on the startling similarities between what happened in the 1930s and what’s happening today.
“We need to learn the lessons of history,” he said. “There was another political party in the past which had democratic support, which provided social services, which played an important role in the political life of the country—Germany in the 1930s—which was also dedicated to violence against the Jewish people.”
May I just say this: I love you, Jason Kenney.
But, hey, that’s me. The suggestion that Hezbollah might have a glancing similarity with the Nazis proved too much for Liberal leadership hopefuls, who came down with a collective case of the vapours. Here’s how the Toronto Star reported it:
Liberals were seething over remarks by Conservative MP Jason Kenney, Harper's parliamentary secretary, who scolded Wrzesnewskyj.
Kenney called comments made by three opposition MPs during their visit to
Last night, Toronto MP Joe Volpe, who's also running for the leadership, said it must be made clear that the "Liberal party's position is not Mr. Wrzesnewskyj's."
"If and when we choose a leader, then we can have that discussion," Volpe (Eglinton-Lawrence), said of the leadership convention planned for the end of November in
He lashed out at Kenney, saying "he never misses an opportunity to be outrageous. "He brings in the worst elements of partisan politics anywhere. It's certainly not very helpful and productive."
Au contraire, Joe. He says it like it is and, like that Jack Nicholson line in “A Few Good Men ” (which, come to think of also describes what your leadership race seems to be lacking), &l